Today Oscar Pistorius, the talented, disabled athlete was found guilty by a South African High Court of culpable homicide. The State were unable to prove, beyond a reasonable doubt, that there was sufficient evidence to find him guilty of murder. The Judge will pass sentence after the State and defence team have presented their cases but Oscar now runs (pun intended) the risk of being sentenced to anything up to 15 years imprisonment.
Mrs Taylor, the mother of Oscar’s previous girlfriend Samantha, has written a book called “An Accident Waiting to Happen”. In her book she describes the 18 month relationship that “almost killed her daughter”. She describes how he “went on the offensive against her daughter”, trashed her name and reputation and used his friends to threaten her friends and family. Initially she found herself wanting to mother the legless young man, who had lost his mother at a young age and had shown such bravery and determination in his life. However his moodiness, constant lies, anti-social behaviour and rages soured his relationship with the family completely.
There is no doubt that Oscar Pistorius is an abuser. He has abused Samantha and killed Reeva Steenkamp. But Oscar has a girlfriend!!! Clearly there is yet another woman out there who believes that it will be different with her. She will make him see the light. She believes she will love him enough to curb his rage. I quote Samantha’s mother “I wish I had told my story earlier. Perhaps Oscar might have sought assistance and things may have turned out differently”.
Thank you Mrs. Taylor but I suspect that it would not and will not. Until domestic violence is better understood in all its complexity and nuances some women will continue to believe that their particular breed of loving is the answer. We at www.abuseendswhenyouloveyourself.com aim to provide that clarity in a study guide that will act as a guide-dog to women for whom the alarm bells don’t ring. These women are at risk, no less than Reeva was when she began her idyllic romance with the hero of the track.